"A Sea Horse Meets an Angel"

"Whimsical Angels and a Sea Horse"

Everyone has a story to tell
prison robes felt
rainbow that came after the rain
I cradle mine
and listen to yours.

I search out my song
listen to silence when needed.

I place a fence around my garden
my garden that is me.
I let in what will cause my garden to grow.
I think of of the times I failed
saw wilted stones
tossed them into a lake
skipped time
skipped me.

Gentle flowers sing.
They leave a delicate fragrance
they dance when the wind is right.
I prop them with a stick and gentle cords
they await my compliant sighs.

Sometimes
I cannot swim in this sea
close the wrong doors
open the right ones
decipher my worth here
and yet
I hear those flowers panting.

I write about fairies
whimsical angels
musicians of the heart
I post their pictures high.
I hope that I can still reach them later
when later arrives.

I get tired of hearing of dead robins
and yet
I cannot help but run to their rescue.
I feel their last breath
hold their fate
and mine
I can only sigh at theirs.
I cry for them.

I drew a sea horse.
I will mount it and it will take me home.
I will gather all the roses
and dead robins in the yard.
All the angels and fairies will meet me
past that last star
no longer bleeding.
I will wrap up wounds
with ribbons and bows
and we will leave them there.

Kathy Ostman-Magnusen | kathysart.com

Self Acceptance & Acknowledgment of Achievements, Self Confidence Here I Come! (I hope?)

As an artist who questions herself on an hourly basis, "Is this the right direction? Is this good? Am I there yet or at least close?" I understand the need for confidence builders.

I don't consider myself to be a genius in any way shape or form. I am at times haunted by indecision and self doubt. I think that sense of indecision does confirm intelligence however so I give myself that star and post in on my bulletin board .

I have always felt that the second you think you have arrived you are indeed finished. You will never meet that goal if that is indeed your goal. Try to fall in love with the process.

A mark of intelligence it so admit wrong, see visions in the simple and create in oneself the ability to creatively express it.

I had an artist friend once who told me that if I wanted to learn to paint well that I could learn from an past artists. He said the best way is to read about the artists life. What caused them to find expertise and what their journey like. Oft times I relate on some level and realize their struggles were something I can relate to.

I am not nor have I ever been alone in my struggle for self acceptance and acknowledgment of achievements.

I have come across plenty of artists who say they know it all and then you see their work and put it into perspective. Sometimes people say they have the answers you need and it turns out they are just sort of full of themselves. You know?

Maybe, just maybe by putting it all into perspective I can arrive at some middle ground and accept that I do have reasons to feel confident about myself. It is OK to say I have reached certain goals and feel proud of the process. I am learning and growing. I am and you are too. Lets realize our efforts and feel confident about recognizing the journey is difficult at times maybe, but we are none the less making the effort, a real sign of intelligence!

We are all trying to find our way.